Who is to be Blamed? Love or Life?

Like the days when I started realizing that I had fallen for you months back and the tingling feeling that made me have butterflies in my stomach just minutes before meeting you, I feel the same even to this day, when it has been 6 years that I met you last. Every time you say, “Let’s catch up in the evening?” or “I am on my way to meet you and will leave for office by 3:00 pm (for the 4:00 pm shift)”, I still feel the blood rush inside me. I make sure to look my best whenever we plan to catch up for a drink or to just grab a bite nearby.

Then there are instances when you go crazy over things I don’t even know about. You think I cheat, you think I am a trouble in your life. The smile I see on your face turns into anger that creeps me out. And all I wish doing at that point of time is run and never see your face again. All I wish I can do is pack my bags, book a ticket to any place unknown and start a life where you can never bother me. Start a life where I can think of doing things I like to do and talk to people I like to talk to.

But, it takes just a few hours or maybe a day or two for me to realize again that deep down inside, I am ready to face these troubles all my life. Deep inside, I can feel my heart whisper, “He too has done a lot for you all these years.” I am told that he isn’t the only person who troubles me, but I do the same too in my own way. And then I realize that we make mistakes in every turn of our life, but what matters is if we accept the mistake and do not repeat it again, a person can be given a chance. As it is said, “Life is full of surprises.”

I do not know any end to this writing and sharing this post. All I know is I wanted to pour out my feelings and learn how better will I feel doing so 🙂

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